the defeatists!

Things that I should be commenting on but, why bother...

I'm just irritated today. I spent a good deal of time on somewhat meaningless conference calls and listening to people whine about trivial shit. This is what I do for a living -- it's called servant leadership, I think. Well, whatever it is, they don't pay me enough. Still, it's draining and with TopGear doing lousy repeats, I'm screwed until the books I ordered show up...a combination of Bernard Henri-Levy (Sartre-The 20th Century Philosopher) and Tim Dorsey (Hammerfish Torpedo). Sublime and ridiculous...not unlike the news.

Item the first...This far and away tops the whole kill a Muslim for Ramadan thing. Iraq is licensing every physician to carry one gun. Really? Instead of asking the guy what's wrong with me, ask him what caliber he's packing. First thing I need to know about my docs is what their preference, auto or semi-auto. Seems that the bi-secularist murderers have been targeting doctors since the beginning of this nonsense. Well, sure -- if there aren't any doctors left, they'll kill each other off faster and then we can auction it off the 7 Sisters or however many big players there are in the Oil Bidness these days. Also, every sonofabitch in the country during Saddam's rule had access to all the guns they could carry. I'm not sure that one gun will be enough...

Item the Bee...The Pirates of Somali. Seriously. Piracy has been a rising problem in the Indian Ocean and points around for a while, so the fact that a bunch of Somali Brothers of the Coast have taken over a Ukiranian shop and found it loaded not with cheesy potato based snacks or vodka but with tanks, ammunition and grenade launchers is utterly shocking. Their asking price for ransom is absurdly high, given the quality and vintage of the tanks, ammo and grenande launchers. The T72 was a crappy tank 30 years ago, and it's still a crappy tank...just far more seriously outclassed by everyone including the Swedes, Brits and the Russians. The T72 was dead meat in front of an old US M60A2; the M1 Battletank or the Brit Centurion will chew it up. So, I suspect that if we continue the blockade and maybe make some threats like getting out of the way when the Russians get there, we may ultimately get them to pay us $20M to take the things off their hands.

Item the Trey...David Petraeus is looking a lot like George Marshall. Unfortunately, the people he works for are starting to bear a striking resemblance to an Oliver Stone movie...and not one of the good ones, like Platoon or Bush but more like Alexander. The R's wannabe is bearing a  striking resemblance to Alex's horse...after the spears got him. The reason why Obama hasn't used the word victory in Iraq as a goal is simple - we had that moment in 2003. It's all be south since then, and Petraeus is now talking sensibly about the other provinces of Iraq/Iran/Absurdistan. Tits up we go, wheeeeee.

Item quatorze...Are these people fucking drunk? Did the Republican caucus forget to strain the sterno? I thought these guys were supposed to be the party of business. Nancy Pelosi gives a speech pointing out the fallacy of an ideology and the R's have an attack of the vapors..."that little dago Catholic hom--lovin' bitch from San Francisco is talking bad abouts us, Cletus. I declare, I  shall hold my breathe until I turn blue!" This from the mob that brought us the impeachment of Bill Clinton, the whole cut and run nonsense, the K street strategy and on and on and on and on. I used to think that the Stalinists in France were the ultimate ideologues...the contortions these people have to go to get out of bed in the morning must be amazing. Well, you could contend that Leninist-Stalinist ideology destroyed the viability of communism as a form of government. In fact, I would do so. It looks like the downfall of the American economic hegonomy, free markets and free trade will be brought about the most rabid ideologues of the American super-power.

Nope, I'm busy. Can't be bothered by the end of the world as we know it. It pretty much sucks, and difficulties aside, my brothers and I have figured out a post apocalyptic fast found chain -- Rat on a Stick. When everything goes south, we'll sell various rat based nutrition products for people's children whom we will feed to our cats...Mainly because cats are preferable to people.

Happy Ramadan....now die, motherfucker!

I am really dumbfounded by this, although we should be used to it by now. At Easter and Christmas, Christians tend to have truces. Of course, the sectarian violence in Iraq means that the fact that a Sunni is celebrating Ramadan is an insult that must be avenged by blood, and vice versa. If you're one of the fanatics...now, as you may have guessed, we're not reall excited about fanatics here at Defeatist Central, except for some sports fans and musicians. Adults who dress up as Harry Potter or Snape need to be committed.  People in Southern Connecticut who suddenly became Giants fans in February 08 need to be whipped. If I find myself in another argument about who's better, the Stones or the Airplane, I'm going to get very irritated. But, I probably won't kill anyone over it.

Christians in general stopped killing for Christ as a mass movement following the Peace of Westphalia in 1648, after the various Protestant and Christian armies basically eliminated most of the German people. If you kill everybody, that is a bad thing. If you think that the Irish stuff was about religion, you're naive. The IRA is not a Catholic organization; granted, the Orange Order is sort of a religious organization, but it's like the Knights of Columbus for Protestant Masons. In Iraq, these dipshits are still enraged over what went down in Karbala when Omar and his forty thieves were either martyred or executed or ate some bad rat on a stick and croaked. 

The randomness of the violence is what makes it particularly absurd. If you're a Sunni going to gym and a Sunni-inspired bomb blasts you into pieces, are you a Martyr and entitled to your 70 virgins? Or are you a chump? My guess, of course, is chump...but that goes for all of it or all of them. This is actually a win-win for those of us in the WOPF...if the People of Faith all slaughter each other in the name of the great Jehovah, Allah, Twisted Sister of the Traveling pants or whatever, we just need to keep away from the murderous sonsabitches...

Some freak in his sandals with his long curly hair...

I'll bet he's a commie or even worse yet a Jew...just when you think we might have a little hope for the future, you realize you're metaphysically smoking crack...Hayes Carll actually gets threats about this song, how dare he threaten Joshua ben Joseph? So, if you thought that viral video about the undecided might be a bit over the top, remember that one. And, that for some Americans, Sarah Palin is a moderate, and probably not to be trusted.

Here's a gratuitous bit of Highway 87

And what would a Texas posting be without some Robert Earl Keen?

And then the guy who taught John Lennon how to play the harmonica with the song that got me to buy everything he had out on vinyl back in '83, D. McClinton

To finish up with a bit more that should be the anthem of Texas...

IOZ isn't the only genius satirist in Pittsburgh...

I initially started reading The Angry Drunk Bureaucrat because I liked the title. While the focus is local, and all I know about Pittsburgh is that those sorry bastards at Duquesne accepted me without giving me a fellowship, and when the revolution comes I'm going to drive my Battletank all over their fucking-existential phenomenology-Merleau Ponty-philosophy department...and, they stole a NFC Championship from the Raiders...a World Series from the Yankees...and the great Mark Randall and the marvelous Anne Leora Winchell all hail from the place. And, of course, IOZ. So, when ADB focuses on Pittsburgh I'm not so involved; but when he focuses on larger issues, such as government, the economy, and related stuff, I not only can relate but want to applaud. I'm not sure why I'm assuming ADB is a man, of course; hell, he/she/it could be a consortium. But, this is pretty cool stuff:

My friends," said McCain to a crowd of nearly 3,000 octogenarians, "we are at war with an enemy that has attempted to undermine our civilization, from back when I spent five and a half years as a prisoner of the Viet-cong to when they tried to assassinate me and my father Czar Nicholas II in 1917." This marks the fourth time in as many days that the McCain campaign has tried to equate the struggle against global terrorism with the cold war struggle against Communism, and has implied that he is the missing Russian Duchess Anastasia.

Now, this is satire at its best. Sarcasm, but nicely down.  I particularly like the "Anastasia" touch. Then, there's this one, that letter to Hankie-Pankie Paulson is also skeweringly crystal cool:

As I was feverishly digging through the cemeteries this weekend to horde any gold fillings that certain next-of-kin had abandoned in their hastily discarded relative's corpses, I saw that you were proposing bailing out the financial sector with up to $700 billion of taxpayer money. I must say that this is a very gutsy move on your part as you are now leaving the fate of the nation's, if not the world's, economy in the hands... people with not enough social skills to make it in the "real" economy and who are merely counting down the days until retirement ...mean, your party has advocated since the mid eighties for, as so eloquently articulated by that paragon of neo-conservative intellectualism Grover Norquist*, a government small enough to drown in a bathtub( AXE Comment: Norquist is to intellectuals what preparation H is to coq au vin)...So, as you folks are obviously new to all this government helping stuff (at least I assume you are, I have yet to find an example to the contrary), I figured I would give you a few economic pointers on where and how to use this money so that it maximizes the benefits to the financial markets:...Invest in printing more money...)My buddy Vince)This guy is so good at gambling; he wins nearly half the time. So, if you want a really sound investment, give the money to Vince and he'll double it...Zimbabwe...The Internet.  My understanding is that this whole Internet thing is going to be big...Porn.  Seriously, I can't think of anything else that holds up as well during turbulent economic times...Well, those are my solutions.  I'm sure there are "intellectual" ideas...hose things, however, won't demonstrate the power and shear awesomeness of a Republican lead government program. Those are small minds for people that don't believe in un-regulation and don't want to see $700 Billion pissed away...

So, as the election staggers on to its inevitably strange conclusion -- a Biden/Palen joint Presidency decided by the House? A coup led by the Illuminati and Dino Don Rumsfeld?  -- I'll be tuning into my twin sages from the junction of the Allegheny and the Susquehanna on a daily basis, and I suggest you do as well.

Hating life but thank god for France...and oatmeal cookies

It's Saturday here at the AXE cave, and I'm fighting with web-browsers. It's been an adventure, and I'm wondering if AOL offers anything better than Chrome/Safari/Explorer/Firefox. I loaded Google Chrome, and made the mistake of importing my bookmarks. It didn't copy the damned things from Firefox, it stole the bastards. Firefox has issues as we all know, so I decided to reload the latest upgrade. That was a fucking mistake. For some reason, the navigation buttons on the top aren't working. Chrome doesn't appear to have a discernible autofill; Safari is bizarre; I hate Microsoft on principle. Fuck it all. I was happier in the day, scribing my thoughts in runes on the side of rocks.

However, one pleasant thing remains the Wideo du Jour from Wideo.Francais. (www.wideo.fr) I don't speak French or read much of it; baguette, croissant, mes amis, je nais sais pas, etc. You know, the tag lines of a liberal arts background seasoned by the inability as a young man to get up early. However, I find that I rarely need the damn language to appreciate the videos. First of all, they seem to be almost as obsequious as YouTube and MySpace. Then, the contributors are French, and therefore they really don't have anything else to do anyway...

And, there's an occasional gem. Some of the stuff is obnoxious, some of it weird but most of it is enjoyable froth and sometimes there's depth. Not often, but at least as often as on YouTube and maybe more. Enchante'...

 

UPDATE: Got some advice, like "Are you using Vista?" and " I love Firefox 3.03 what's the matter with you?" and "Have you tried "Opera?" The answers are No, Quite a bit probably, and Not yet. What I did do was reload 2.0 and it works fine. I also visited the Google "We're all nerds together" site and found that  there is no autofill function and everybody is equally irate. I'm still considering what to do. I've pretty much had it with the current hardware and software situation, and haven't decided what to do next...One thought is a (shudder) Mac; the other is to basically max out a PC. The one I like best is to get a life, but I'm open to suggestions...

Body synching...?

I found this thing over on TRex where he was using it to make a point of some political note. Now, I'm of an age where I remember these guys, about the time that Sopwith Camel and the Blues Magooes were putzing around making a lot of rock musicians wonder about maybe going Country or Blues or something with some merit. This is actually not that bad a song, but Jesus Christ, what the fuck are they doing? The vocalist is beating time on his leg suitable for MONYMONY; the guitar player is channeling his inner, although utterly repressed Hendrix...where the hell is the guitar in this song? There's all sorts of stuff happening but none of it has anything to do with the music being played, even though it's supposed to be that -- I never thought that this was something I wanted to sit down and learn, and I still don't. But, it deserved a better early morning Saturday rock regional tv show performance than this one...

This is actually pretty scary...

I initially saw this on Drew Sullivan's blog after a referral from one of my brothers, and my first thought was, well, how trite. I really wouldn't want pictures of me floating around stoned and giving the piece sign while playing "Masters of War" out of tune...but then I noticed one thing and remembered another. She looks in this exactly like she does now. And, she's running for national office. I was hoping for the talent contest, where I understand she field dressed an elk in 30 minutes, nude and did a happy dance waiving around the heart and liver smeared with blood, shit and entrails. However, this will have to do...

Sound, fury, pride, passion ...Over a Blog?

OK, just to get this straight. This is Naomi Wolf!

Our brother the immortal IOZ is taking fire from a variety of sources, including some dimwit who then got upset over Mr. Fundamental's styling. At which point, the Defeatists were called in to give some covering fire...anyway, this piece on a progressive's somewhat hysterical and paranoid response to Sarah, Todd, Turdblossom published in Huffington Post caused the uproar. The first responder said only "Wolf." Well, yes, gotcha. While Naomi Wolf is a hysterical progressive who actually is a very attractive woman according to her Wiki entry despite her concerns with men objectifying women. The piece began with this, "Please understand what you are looking at when you look at Sarah "Evita" Palin. You are looking at the designated muse of the coming American police state," and rapidly spiraled downward from there into despair, gloom and wrist-slitting. For the record, which ever Naomi-thon wrote the piece was indeed hyperventilating and Sarah Palin is not going to be president of the United States, she's going to be in Alaska in jail for corruption unless she of course gives herself a pardon for it because that's what the great Jehovah and the Continental Congress intended.

Now, Naomi Klein is another hysterical progressive who is also a attractive, somewhat younger woman who has written a  somewhat paranoid but intriguing book, The Shock Doctrine  and who also writes for the Huffington Post. IOZ had a little bit of fun posting this Huffington wail as well as an add-on. "I wrote The Shock Doctrine in the hopes that it would make us all better prepared for the next big shock. Well, that shock has certainly arrived, along with gloves-off attempts to use it to push through radical pro-corporate policies (which of course will further enrich the very players who created the market crisis in the first place...)."  Yeah, an ellipsis inside a parenthetical comment followed by a period. I have to admit that the "but intriguing" is based on reviews...I started reading it, and her syntax and level of hysteria reminded me of something on a site like "Exposing Reptillians" or the "The Gates of Vienna."

You know, I think the problem for literate people writing posts is that they occasionally miss something because they generally know how to spell, or transpose a name because they know a lot of people with a similar name who are floating around in their heads; they aren't writing term papers and they're actually thinking as they write. IOZ has actually read both gals' work and thought about their writing and their material. (If I'm a sexist for calling somethings named Naomi gals, you need to seek help.) Many bloggers and readers suffer from virtual illiteracy and an addiction to MS Office...I envision them in their little cubicles or maybe in the local Starbucks, writing their little posts in Word, Spellchecking, maybe changing the fucking font and background, adding a watermark, then copying it and sending it forward. If you spell and grammar check, and if all you've ever read is The Audacity of Hope, Harry Potter and the Utne Reader, you're somewhat restricted in your ability to err, however slightly. Wolfe, Klein, whatever. Blogging, despite what I used to endure when I would guest blog over on Eye of the Storm, and Crispin would correct my fucking grammar, is not pedagogy. It's not even gogy. It's our Speaker's Corner, and that's really all it is.

And, for the record, this is Naomi Klein.

So, Dudes and Dudettes, please, give the gay Gatsby of Pittsburg a break. Still, I'm totally befuddled by the passion on this one. Now, IOZ must be doing something right -- people actually care enough to respond to what he writes. My post, of which this is an elaborative, self-plagaristic parody, was number 74!!!   Of course, he doesn't have the typepad anti-robot to discourage comments. Still, the only time we ever got anything like that was when AGI picked on a Christian, Neo-Punk Boy(Kindof) Band, calling them retards and shit. Turns out, they were both. So, we're jealous.... But, if we got a bizillion hits at Defeatist Central over some nonsense I tossed up but misconfused to channel Twitshit a bit,  Naomi Klein-Wolf-Woof with Naomi Judd and the focus was on the Naomi Judd and not the substance  of my piece, I would just call the idiots who got that worked up fucking idiots and go on to something else more interesting. Note that IOZ read them, and actually responded to a few with his usual lupine grace and wit. When we get that level of snark, we tend to invite people to read something else, and to go the fuck away...I guess that might be why we don't get a lot of comments. That, and of course, no body reads us...except referrals from IOZ. So hang in there, buddy, and while I know you won't let the bastards grind you down, please continue to add grace, wit and that touch of viperous compassion to what  so often is a waste of synapse, energy, electricity and time.

"I didn't know you were Catholic..."

Nothin' but good times ahead...So, let's review the story so far. The liberals are willing to compromise for the good of the nation, the conservatives are scoring political points, the drooling idiot in the corner remains the drooling idiot in the corner but now joined by Senator Senility, and the would-be Master of the Universe in the Executive Branch is kow-towing to the Speaker of the House. For some reason, I'm reminded of a very old Popeye cartoon based on Romeo and Juliet...

In the Roosevelt Room after the session, the Treasury secretary, Henry M. Paulson Jr., literally bent down on one knee as he pleaded with Ms. Pelosi not to “blow it up” by withdrawing her party’s support for the package over what Ms. Pelosi derided as a Republican betrayal.“I didn’t know you were Catholic,” Ms. Pelosi said, a wry reference to Mr. Paulson’s kneeling, according to someone who observed the exchange. She went on: “It’s not me blowing this up, it’s the Republicans.” Mr. Paulson sighed. “I know. I know.”

Camus and Merleau-Ponty, outflank 'em to the left! Kierkegaard and Kafka, cut off their avenue of escape! Nietzsche, covering fire! On three!!!

Neo-thomists, Analytic Philosophers and Deconstructionists threaten the fundamental existence of Pakistan, the incoming US commander in the region warned Thursday, as tension mounted between NATO and Pakistani forces on the Afghan frontier.General David Petraeus, who will take charge of US forces in southwest Asia and the Middle East next month, told reporters that Pakistani and US-led troops would have to work together to defeat the Taliban and Al Qaeda"Pakistan faces a threat that certainly seems to be an existential threat," he said, at a press conference at the US embassy in Paris.

 

OK,  I'm confused by this one. Petraeus is an incredibly smart guy, but Pakistan isn't facing an existential crisis. WE ARE! We're the ones who are faced with the fundamental contradiction between what we thought was real and what is real. Since we are intruding on what the Pakistanis consider their airspace and they're shooting back, the odds of a second war are getting better and better...only, this will be NATO/Afghanistan versus Pakistan. The Pakistani government, Army and Security Forces knew what was going on and had a nice detente' going with the Taliban and Rapmaster OsamaB...Again, if there's intervention to "preserve" the Pakistani nucs, look for India to have a role.