Chuckabee

A month ago, few even knew that Huckabee was a former governor of Arkansas, let alone a Republican candidate for president. Then karate-movie tough guy Norris -- with a cult following big enough to populate three continents -- announced he was in Huckabee's camp. (They share evangelical Christian views.) Suddenly, Huckabee became the presidential example of tough-guy cool. You thought Fred Thompson was going to be the law-and-order candidate? He was looking like a worn-out hound dog Wednesday night as Huckabee strode into the debate with the still buffed-up, 67-year-old Norris by his side.

A Huckabee-Norris ticket would go all Major Scott McCoy on the asses of any and all political competition...

That's how Chuck treats U.S. soldiers. Just imagine what he would do to foreigners. Vice President Norris would make Dick Cheney look like Captain Kangaroo. Hugo Chávez and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad are in for a smack-down.

No one gets in the way of Chuck Norris' desire for cheap oil.

Especially when God, Jebus and the entire fucking army of angelic warriors are on your side:

But, umm, wasn't Jesus an adult man when he *allegedly* fed people with loaves and fishes?

Comments

[Frederick]

There is nothing more annoying on this earth than Chuck Fucking Norris, except people who think he's the shit, maybe. O.K. I admit I had an old roommate I didn't get along with and they loved him. Owned tee-shirts with his image on them. So, yes...I am biased in this statement. Doesn't make it any less true.

[digdug]

So if he loses it's God's doing as well?

[BG]

If it is all god's doing, why bother campaigning at all? Why show up for the debate? I hate these demented fuckwits.

[feckless]

My favorite thing about Chuck Norris is his extensive business with Russian Mobsters.

You know, evil Russian, former KGB, Mobsters, the kind Chuck usually spin kicks and then shoots with a rocket launcher?

Chuck loves his night club casino "Chuck Norris' Club Beverly Hills" located in the bottom of one of Stalin's Seven Sister Communist-Gothic skyscrapers in downtown Moscow Russia. You can't get accross the place without bumping into a hooker.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/inatl/exussr/july/29/cakes2907.htm

I wonder if Huckabee is in business with the Russian Mob too?

[HeathenAngel]

Chuck's a poser, anyway. Always has been. Without the magic of Hollywood, he'd have had his ass handed to him a long time ago. This, from a REAL Martial Artist.. his moves are pretty.. but they aren't practical.

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