And he said unto them, Let us Secure The Homeland By The Grace of God
Mr. Fundamental sent me a link from The Agitator about the latest comforting development in the Solomonic State. It seems our born-again President signed an Executive Order yesterday to create a Center for Faith-Based and Community Initiatives in the Department of Homeland Security.
You know that Bush is not fooling around here. He could have created this new office in the Department of Health and Human Services, but no, placing it under DHS demonstrates how committed he is to fighting the War on Terror under the auspices of the Almighty.
The Center must begin operating within 45 days. I hope the president nominates Talibangelist Pat Robertson to head this thing. He could protect the homeland by issuing fatwas against foreign leaders and asking God to send hurricanes to wipe out countries. They'd have to change the terror alert threat level chart to something more Biblically appropriate.
Faith-based cargo inspection: "Only God knows whether or not a suitcase nuke is one of those container ships, so let's place our trust in Him. Faith-based border patrol: "We'll let you in only if you pledge your devotion to Jesus!". And the prison system? Well, brother Jeb already has that covered.
The creation of this new Center poses an exciting career opportunity. Just imagine...Reverend Quitter and I could roam the Southern California area keeping the public libraries safe from pornography.
Nah. Bush would never proclaim the war on Terror as a religious fight...don't you think?
There's a reason this war should be called The Crusades: Part III
Posted by: gotdetroit? | 08 March 2006 at 06:47 AM
Oh, sweet Jesus.
Posted by: The Heretik | 08 March 2006 at 07:34 AM
God sees everything, especially the evil in men's hearts. That's why Cheney's had 19 heart attacks.
Posted by: e_five | 08 March 2006 at 08:12 AM
Just the thing for the fundie who wants to get paid to grope people at checkpoints!
Posted by: just john | 08 March 2006 at 09:26 AM
Now that's fiscal responsibility!
Posted by: Fred | 08 March 2006 at 09:03 PM
Love the homeland security seal. Is that the official one?
Posted by: velid | 09 March 2006 at 12:50 AM
No. But I'm hoping that they'll choose my design. I might as well make some money off this whole theocracy thing.
Posted by: comandante agi | 09 March 2006 at 05:29 AM
Is this satire of Christian fascism?
-Steffan, Christian.
Posted by: Steffan | 11 June 2007 at 01:03 AM
Sadly, the line between satire and reality was dissolved long ago by the Bush administration.
Posted by: Comandante Agi | 11 June 2007 at 10:25 AM
satire? what's that?
Posted by: mr.fun | 11 June 2007 at 05:24 PM